Cogito ergo scribo

You may have heard of me before. After all, my story had been retold so many times in so many versions. I think it's time for me to tell you my side of the story.

I came from a place called the Skull Island. No, don't bother to look for it on the world map because you wouldn't find it at all. I can't remember how long i had been on this island. In fact, i can't remember most of the things that happened when i was younger, like how i came about, what my parents looked like, why i'm all alone without anyone else who looks like me around... but then, i guess all these weren't important part of my story, so let's move on.

As you can see, life became quite boring on the island sometimes. I didn't have any friends at all. Those dinosaurs are either too stupid to understand me, or meat eaters whom a vegetarian like me would rather keep a distance. The only entertainment i got everyday was to sat by the cliff to watch the sunset. Oh ya, and i shouldn't forget about the strange little toys that were given to me every month.

Talking about those little toys, well, they were so tiny -- not even the size of my thumb. To tell you the truth, i didn't really fancy them that much. They were black and dirty, and their faces were always pierced with all kinds of strange things. They just kept on making this loud and annoying sound that simply made my ears hurt. Sometimes i would shake them very hard hoping to make the sound stop, but then it only seemed to get worse. I could put up with the noises anytime but not in the evening when the sun is about to set. I demanded total peace and silence at that time. So i had no choice but to break those little noisy things into pieces, just to have some quiet time to enjoy my sunset moment. See, it wasn't really my fault at all. I just wished they knew when to keep their mouths shut.

Then one day, i heard the drumming again signalling that it was the time of the month for me to collect my new toy again. I was just hoping that they could get me a different toy this time and golly, my wish really came true! This little new toy was so much different from all the ones that i had before. She wasn't black at all. In fact, the hair and the skin were gold in color and glowed under the ray of sun. She didn't have any strange things pierced on her face and her green eyes were simply enchanting. She could do all these cute and funny movements that made me laughed, unlike those black toys who only knew how to gave me a headache.

I decided to keep this toy. I would do anything to protect her from all harm. To think that the three tyrannosauri even dared to lay their eyes on her. Boy, i sure show 'em what i was made of. Well, of course i was hurt in the fight. Nobody would possibly come off uninjured from battling so hard with such vicious creatures. But i wasn't gonna let her see my pain. No, no way. I was the alpha male that would never show my weakness to any female. All i would show her was how i roar and pound my chest. That's the way to get a girl to go gaga over you. This trick hardly fails.

Yet, if it does fail, there's always another way to impress her -- the sentimental way. I brought her to the high ground and shared my sunset moment with her. She was obviously touched as i could see the water in her beautiful green eyes. She even uttered something gently to me while putting her hand over chest. I didn't know what that meant but i was sure it was something lovely. Right at that moment, i knew it: i was in love. I decided to make her my Queen Kong.

I was so tired from all the action and fell asleep soon after. Then i was awaken by some noise to only see that another small creature was trying to steal my Queen away. I was furious. I wanted to get her back but was hindered by those stupid bats. Gosh, i tell you, those bats were really stupid. I had no idea why they attacked me and not the two of them at all.

Nothing could come between me and my Queen. Oh, no siree. I fought off those stupid bats and went after my Queen all the way to the sea. There were a few more little creatures by the sea trying to tie me down. I wouldn't let them but i guess even the strongest alpha male couldn't beat these magical creatures. You see, these creatures could run through the forest and came out not with the slightest injuries and with their faces still clean. I overturned their boat and saw them flew into the air and smashed against the rocks; yet, some of them, especially the fat one, could still stand up and threw a bottle of smelly gas at my face. And they even managed to carry me to another strange place in that lousy ship of theirs. Well, if they didn't use magic, then i don't know how they did all these at all.

When i finally regained my consciousness, i found myself chained in that strange place with many more little creatures looking at me. Then i thought i saw my Queen slowly rising from the ground but it wasn't her at all. I needed to look for her so i broke lose.

As i was searching for her, i heard those loud annoying noise again coming from all those little creatures that were running about. I also saw these strange little square things that moved around on top of four round things. I had never seen such creatures on my island before. I didn't really care too. I just wanna look for my Queen.

When i finally found her, we had so much fun on this slippery ground. But alas, good time always doesn't last long. The slippery ground suddenly broke open so i gotta bring my Queen to higher ground. I looked for the tallest tree in the area and climbed all the way to the top. The trees there were very strange. There weren't any leaves or branches, and the trunk felt icy cold. But never mind that. I just wanted some peaceful moment with my beloved because the sun was rising. It was so beautiful like the sunset we had watched on the island. I put my hand over my chest, just like what she did at that time. Those were the happiest moments in my life.

To my dismay, some noisy flying creatures spoilt the moment. I thought i could chase them away just like i did with those stupid bats. But these flying creatures spat at me and their poisonous spittle pierced through my skin. I tried my chest-pounding and roaring action again, thinking that it might scare them off. It was of no use. They spat at me some more and it hurt like hell. Damn those flying creatures.

I could feel the energy draining out of my body slowly. This was the first time i ever felt so sleepy. I saw the water in her eyes again. And as i was looking into those beautiful eyes, i fell asleep...

Well, i guess that's all i wanna tell you about my story. Of course, this is very much the condensed version. If you want to know about all the details, you should know where to get it. Just be warned that it's gonna be freaking 3 hours long. No wonder i heard some people calling me "King Long" instead. I don't really mind that nickname because there's indeed something about me that's long enough to be called such.

Anyway, for the record, my name is Kong, King Kong. And just in case you wanna invite me over for dinner or something, i like the leafstalk straightened, not curved.

Labels: opinion