Cogito ergo scribo

I'm slowly losing all hope in love and marriage.

I've mentioned before that i am a hopeless romantic who idealises love. I believe that eternal true love does exist in this world, and that marriage is the promise of a lifetime to love each other till the end of time.

But what do we see now everyday? People cheating on their spouses, breakups and divorces. I am losing faith and starting to wonder if i am indeed living in a dream world that i've built up in my mind.

Is it really so difficult to truly, fully and faithfully love ONE person, wholeheartedly without reservation, till eternity?

It just comes so naturally to me, to love a person with my heart and soul. Hence i can never understand how people find it so hard to do so. It is the more puzzling to me when in involves marriage.

You decided to marry a person because you feel or think you love that person, and you have the confidence that you will feel the same forever and want to be with her/him for the rest of your life. I understand that things change and people change with time, but then isn't true love supposed to be unyielding?

And if it does change in the end, then why resort to cheating and lying? If you feel that how you felt before the marriage is no longer there, tell your spouse truthfully and work on it; if you feel that all love have already lost and your heart is now with another, and there is no way to turn it back anymore, then end the marriage and move on. Why cheat and lie???? How can you possibly do such thing to a person whom you once loved so much????

The thing is this -- it is already very painful to have to deal with the lost of love and the apprehension for the future of being alone again, it aggravates the hurt so much more when one has to deal with the betrayal and destruction of her beliefs and dreams too. It is, in fact, the latter that is harder to let go... especially when the betrayal is so serious.

Yes, really, i am now seriously wondering if there is indeed a thing called "true love" in this world at all. It probably is just something we human made up, thinking that we are capable of such strong and sacred feeling when we are mere mortals who are weak and susceptible to greed and temptations. Human was probably trying to mimic God's divine love for us, and fooling ourselves that we have the ability to love a person like how He loves us, but the truth is we are by nature sinners and we are simply incapable of the love of such magnitude.

Who are we kidding really? True love is but an illusion. Seek no more, as it simply does not exist.

Labels: love, opinion