Today, i was flipping through our photo albums, looking at the pictures we took back in Munich when we were still friends, the pictures at the Peanuts cartoon exhibition when we had just started our relationship, the pictures of our trips to Kota Kinabalu, Kuching, Genting and Cemeron highlands, the pictures we took back in his hometown Bukit Mertajam for his brother's wedding, for the birth of his first nephew... we were part of each other's lives for so many years -- everyday, every moment...
I felt the heartache when looking at the sweet and happy smiles we had on our face in the photos. I can feel the love and happiness between us, as if there wasn't anything that could ever separate our love for each other.
Now, these smiles are no longer there, taken away by his betrayal. His smiles no longer belong to me; his happiness now comes from another woman, and his smiles are no longer shown for me and for me only, but for another person. As for me, that same blissful smiles will no longer exist anymore, forever lost as i lost his heart to another.
People have told me before that i have a sweet and innocent smile. I'd look good and charming with smiles on my face. Yet, all i have now is just the sadness in my eyes and the sorrow on my face.
I gotta find that smiles of mine that are lost. I gotta find it again, no matter how long it is gonna take, i will find it again.
Labels: love
