I think, therefore I write. (我思,所以我写。)

Cogito ergo scribo

Friday, October 02, 2009


My heart is filled with sorrow.

Have been having flashes of memories recently -- Germany, Snoopy exhibition, dating at Causeway Point, Yishun, KK, the flower horn fish, the popularity and saturation of bubble tea, treasure hunt at Kuantan, BKK shopping trip with Ultraman exhibition, Kuching, Hougang, little pillow, mimicking the cry of baby, playing air drums, fake double eyelids, pretending to be deity-possessed when wearing the yellow t-shirt, dancing while snapping the fingers left and right, obsession with Chinese tea and golfing, Starbucks and Bearistas, Rendezvous Hotel, Ikea, the many downloaded variety shows and dramas watched together...

Then what followed were that many months of excruciating pain; every expression of impatience and disgust towards me, every lie, every harsh word and cold shoulder...

Too much memories, good and bad, happy and sad. Yet, the good and happy memories are only making the heart twitch even harder, knowing that all these are forever lost and will never return ever again.

Hurting inside still, but everyday am just pushing myself forward. Push and push and push, numbing myself of all thoughts.

But then, the time has come when reality forces me to look at it straight in the eyes. It is about time to really say the final goodbye; it's near, very soon.

There are many forms of love in this world, and one of them is letting go. Truly loving a person is to think of what is the best for him and set him free, no matter how much it's hurting inside.

Nothing hurts more than being betrayed and then completely losing the person whom you love the most in your life and whom you thought would spend the rest of your life with. Suddenly, the piece of the puzzle that is supposed to make your life complete is forever missing. And so is a piece of your heart.

Yet, we still wake up to a brand new day every single morning, despite our hope sometimes that we can just sleep forever and do not see another suffering day. The earth will never stop revolving during our sorrowful time. The whole world is still moving, faster than normal.

The reality is that life gotta go on, even with just partial of your heart.

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Thursday, October 01, 2009 @ 6:49 am: My theme song 105
Thursday, October 01, 2009 @ 6:02 am: Stop whining
Wednesday, September 30, 2009 @ 7:36 pm: I am mad
Wednesday, September 30, 2009 @ 5:33 am: Hungry
Wednesday, September 30, 2009 @ 4:58 am: Very tired
Tuesday, September 29, 2009 @ 4:57 am: Back late
Monday, September 28, 2009 @ 4:35 am: Maid-less
Sunday, September 27, 2009 @ 5:39 am: Weekend headache
Saturday, September 26, 2009 @ 4:53 am: My theme song 104
Saturday, September 26, 2009 @ 4:43 am: Late night craving