The Chinese guy has been a Christian for 7 years and he could even memorise the verse in the Bible. I'm not sure why he only decided to be baptised now. I think it may be because he's getting married soon and probably his fiance has already been baptised.
I've actually noticed them every Sunday when i'm at the Sunday service because of two things: (1) They are always at least half-an-hour late every week and need the ushers to look for seats for them (and i do not like this because i can't understand why they can't leave home a bit earlier and be on time for the service). (2) They are very loving couple (once they were late as usual and so happened to be seated in front of me. When the pastor asked everyone to greet the persons around us, the guy kissed the gal on her cheek, gazed lovingly into her eyes and wished her morning.)
Anyway, during the class when touched upon to topic of faith, the teacher asked if we believed that we are going to heaven, the Indian guy kept quiet, the Chinese guy replied a very affirmative "yes", and i said, "no, not at this moment".
Then the teacher said that if we have enough faith, we should believe that there is a place for us in heaven, for this is the promise to us from God and He never lies. And if we have a strong faith in living the Christianity life, why would we doubt that we will be going to heaven?
I then told him that i have no doubt in Him, but the doubt is in myself. I said we were educated since young to analyse things with science and with logical thinking. Yet there are things in the Bible that i cannot comprehend and sometimes doubts will come into my mind. Hence i do believe in God, but the one whom i do not believe is actually myself.
To that, the teacher smiled and said that it is a choice that we consciously make, whether to believe or not to believe. Since the dawn of age, there have been a lot of miracles around the world that even the scientists could not provide a plausible explanation. When we are faced with unexplainable events in life, it is up to us to just believe or to doubt.
The session today actually had me re-think about whether or not i should wait for a longer while before i get baptised. I have been postponing it because i feel that my faith in Christianity is still not strong enough. When i am baptised, i want myself to be truely devoted without a singe doubt.
But then, being a baby Christian who has yet to grow further in the knowledge and faith in Christianity, be it due to Satan's work or my own cynical nature, doubts often creep in and hinder me from strengthening my faith. All my life, i've hated hypocrites. Hence i asked myself if i am really ready to make the declaration to the world that i am a Christian if i am not practising it to its fullest, whether spiritually or physically.
I know mom will be disappointed if i am not baptised together with her, but then it is not about her but my relationship with God. I really need to think about it.
Nevertheless, i should still complete the class next week, and the decision can come later.
Labels: Christianity, life
