Being the smart gal that i am, i immediately sensed something wasn't right. Normally when a guy says something like that, it means he has done something that the gal really hates, or maybe even worse, he has betrayed the gal.
So i asked him the first thing that came into my mind, "You smoked, didn't you?"
Silence.
Seeing that he just kept quiet, i asked again, "You got a woman outside ah?" To which he replied, "I'm with you everyday. How can i keep a woman outside?"
Then i asked again, "Then? You took our 10K for investment without asking me?" He immediately said, "Eh, the car wasn't sold yet, so where do i get the 10K?"
"Then what was it really?"
"I've been mixing with some colleagues lately who smoke. So i took a puff when they offered me the cigarette," he confessed finally.
Actually his expression has already given him away when i asked the first question. He didn't deny it and just covered his face with the pillow. I knew then he must have smoked behind my back.
Uh huh, i don't like smokers. Well, to be precise, i don't like people smoking around me because i can't stand the smell of 2nd-hand smoke. I have friends who are smokers of course, and i do know that smoking has no bearing on their personalities. But still, i would prefer them quit smoking because it's bad for their health. By the same token, i would want my boyfriend to be a non-smoker.
When i first knew 贝 as my colleague, he was a smoker. I knew that he used to smoke heavily when he was back in college, something like the first thing he did in the morning before he even got out of the bed was to light up a cigarette. When he was my colleague, he has already cut down on his smoking. After we were together, he quitted smoking (or became what we called "a social smoker"), which happened instantaneously. Yap, he had no problem in quitting at all. It was just like he decided to stop smoking, and then at a snap of the fingers, he stopped completely. That was how i knew that addiction to cigarettes was more like an issue of the mind than the body. It's whether or not one has the determination to do it.
Anyway, back to what happened last night. Upon hearing his confession, i wasn't mad at all, even though i did feel a bit upset. It wasn't so much about him smoking; it was more about him hiding something from me. I thought we always tell each other everything, but i guess sometimes there are still things that we would wanna keep to ourselves.
He then went on to explain that he would only smoke whenever he felt depressed, and it wasn't very nice to be around a bunch of smoker friends and refused to light up when they offered him. Seriously, i don't understand guys at all, you know, this smoking thing to feel the togetherness. The only probable explanation i have is something from the Introduction to Psychology course i took during the university days -- gals socialize by talking, while guys socialize by doing things. So we gotta let our men do their things, which in this instance, is smoking.
Sigh, i guess we Venusians will always have difficulties understanding the Martians, and likewise too. Perhaps that's the way it's meant to be, so that our lives will never cease to be interesting.
Labels: love
