I think, therefore I write. (我思,所以我写。)

Cogito ergo scribo

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Sad today

Met up with YY today to discuss about the arrangement in selling our flat. We have not seen each other for months. I do not feel like relating the meet-up here at all.

I have been feeling rather depressed for a few weeks already, and seeing him today just made my heart ached. I cried while driving home after the meet-up, but i had to take control of my emotions and then stop by the road side for a while to let my teary and red eyes get back to normal before going home. I did not want mom to see my crying face and made her worry.

So i gotta pretend there is no big deal at all. I even went to do hair treatment together with mom, and the whole time my heart was weeping but i gotta behave as if everything was alright. After that, mom sent me to LF's place.

LF and i chatted for a few good hours. Having a friend who understands my pain really helps a lot. I would have shut myself in my room and immersed in sorrow, but after talking it out, i feel better already.

Sadness is still there; it will always be there, and i know it. Healing is a long journey, and a painful one too. I do not know where and when it ends, if it ever does end. Sometimes i even feel that it doesn't seem to matter anymore; whether it ends or not, life goes on.


Don't know what to say, just want to let u know I'm here. It's such a pain to see u like this, can't even cry out your heart.
I fully understand being a filial daughter, u don't want to let your mum worry. Sometimes really hope you can be more 任性 & inconsiderate, then you'll be less miserable, althou I know u won't. Sigh~~~ Take care.

is ok girl, you are strong. you have made great step of not letting out when you shouldn't be. the path is still long ahead, be it easy or difficult, joyous or painful, and you will never walk it alone for you always have many to support and stand by you. so don't give yourself up!

never give up yourself!


Share your cogitation

Wednesday, September 08, 2010 @ 10:19 pm: Silly quiz
Wednesday, September 08, 2010 @ 10:04 pm: 8 9 10
Monday, September 06, 2010 @ 3:53 am: Prince charming
Friday, September 03, 2010 @ 12:39 pm: No eating
Thursday, September 02, 2010 @ 3:54 am: Yesterday
Tuesday, August 31, 2010 @ 4:46 am: It's this day again
Monday, August 30, 2010 @ 4:54 am: Back to school
Friday, August 27, 2010 @ 2:50 am: Unwell and down
Wednesday, August 25, 2010 @ 4:46 am: Sad news from Philippines
Tuesday, August 24, 2010 @ 4:43 am: My blog revealed