I have been feeling rather depressed for a few weeks already, and seeing him today just made my heart ached. I cried while driving home after the meet-up, but i had to take control of my emotions and then stop by the road side for a while to let my teary and red eyes get back to normal before going home. I did not want mom to see my crying face and made her worry.
So i gotta pretend there is no big deal at all. I even went to do hair treatment together with mom, and the whole time my heart was weeping but i gotta behave as if everything was alright. After that, mom sent me to LF's place.
LF and i chatted for a few good hours. Having a friend who understands my pain really helps a lot. I would have shut myself in my room and immersed in sorrow, but after talking it out, i feel better already.
Sadness is still there; it will always be there, and i know it. Healing is a long journey, and a painful one too. I do not know where and when it ends, if it ever does end. Sometimes i even feel that it doesn't seem to matter anymore; whether it ends or not, life goes on.
Labels: love
