So let's take this post on my random thoughts on blogging as the obligatory birthday post, albeit 10 days late.
Beside the first post, i've written 3 blog birthday posts over these 5 years of my life as a blogger. The exception was last year when i was too engulfed in the sorrow that i didn't really bother about it at all.
When this blog was one year old, i counted the number of posts i had published. As of today, excluding this post, the published posts count stands at 1403. I don't know about what you think, but that's actually pretty amazing to me.
In year 2007, i expressed my gratitude to my friends and the silent readers who had kept me blogging.
Then on the following year, i was astonished for still being around and yet also at the same time declared that i shall continue to be around despite my busy lifestyle.
This blog has been a very casual place where i spew nonsense, write crappy stuff, share my thoughts and opinions, talk about the uneventful nitty-gritties of my daily life, be a bitch and rant about things, and let the insensible side of me releasing the stress, sorrow, resentment, anger, and whatever negative pent-up emotions that i may have inside of me that would otherwise make me an unpleasant person in real life.
The ability to write and share freely (and responsibly of course) is what still keep me here after 5 years since i started my first post on this blog. In fact, this has been a healing mechanism for me as well during the most difficult times of my life. I don't think i could have gone through the ordeal if it's not for this blog that enables me to express all the agony and pain in words.
But now, i do know that someone is scrutinising this space now. I gotta be even more careful in my words and what i write about from now on.
Yet, you can never know that what appears to be harmless to you may actually be deemed unacceptable to others. We have seen a lot of such cases on the celebrities, whether singes, actors, politicians, writers, or famous bloggers and prominent YouTubers. They said something without any ill intention, or may even just be a joke, and then they get all kinds of attacks, criticisms, or even legal issues.
The irony of this is that i'm not even famous or anything, and i gotta have the same concerns as well. I guess this is somewhat similar to the question that people may ask you, "when no one is looking, will you do certain things that you would not normally do in public?" The answer is actually obvious, especially to Christians, because we know that there is always SOMEONE looking, whether we see HIM or not. Just that we may often forget about it.
If you do not see the connection there, never mind. Forget about it.
Looking back, there have been many occasions that i've contemplated stop blogging totally. That was when i was busy with life and work, or feeling pointless in blogging when we have Facebook now to keep our friends updated about ourselves, which was one of the reasons why i started a blog 5 years ago. As for another reason, i.e. my passion in writing, the fire also seems to have gradually diminished as i grow older and am caught up in the realities of life.
There were also friends who said to me that it is "dangerous" to share my personal life publicly, even though i've somewhat remained semi-anonymous on this blog over all these years. I could never imagine what possible "dangers" would come my way. Yes, i know that it's not difficult to track me down if someone really wants to do so, but i couldn't understand why anyone would wanna do that at all. I mean, what i write doesn't carry any weight; what i think doesn't really influence anyone; what i believe doesn't really change anything. After all, there are over millions of bloggers out there and indefinitely growing number of web pages on the Internet. So this blog is not even a small fish in a pond, or whatever you call it; it's more like a micro-organism in the open ocean.
But i kinda understand it now. So maybe one day, i will indeed stop blogging. When will that day be? I do not know.
As i've mentioned before, those who read the crap i write are mostly friends in real life. As for the strangers (beside the one monitoring this blog), i seriously do not know why you are reading this at all when there are a lot more interesting stuff out there to read about.
Whatever it is, thanks for being around.
Labels: blogging
